The 11 Stages of Grief When A Loved One Supports Hillary

I saw a post on Scary Mommy's Facebook page with a link to an article titled, "The 7 Stages of Grief When a Loved One Supports Trump."  I simply replied, "Hey Scary Mommy, if I write a post about "the eleven stages of grief when a loved one supports Hillary," will you post it?"

I think I broke the internet.

The conservatives are begging for the article and the liberals are damning me to hell for expressing an opinion.  So I wrote one...but before you read it, maybe you should read some of the comments directed at me simply for asking a question on Facebook (I've removed last names to protect the identity).  Grown-up bullying is real, ya'll...and we wonder where our kids get it:

Katherine: Another whiny conservative pissed that something doesn't apply to them...

 

Donna: Get your own widely-followed blog.

 

Krista: This is a blog of opinions!!!! If you don't like it. LEAVE her blog!!!

 

Susy: Make your own page and post it! Scary mommy doesn't have to post anything we write #getoverit

 

Jessica: Hey, if Scary Mommy wants to make a post about Erin Yonish Brown eating dog excrement, they can! Unlike, it's that simple.

And those were  just a few of the PG-rated responses.  All I did was ask a question.  Good.Ness. 

For the record, I don't love Trump.  At all.  I am a staunch Southern conservative who has never voted anything but RED....and I'm not sure that I can take the plunge this time.  It literally makes my stomach hurt.  Seriously, can you imagine Trump in the same room with Benjamin Netanyahu?   There has to be a meme for that on Pinterest.

My comment was meant to be tongue-in-cheek.  Are there 11 stages of grief when a loved one supports Hillary?  I don't know.  I'm not a therapist.

I am, however, an expert in the policies regarding the safeguarding of classified material.  It's what I do when I'm not scrolling through Facebook looking for a "fun" debate.  (Did I say fun?  I honestly think people want to hurt me...but I digress.)

So without further adieu, here is MY version of "The 11 Stages of Grief When A Loved One Supports Hillary":

1.CONFUSION
You cannot even wrap your brain around the fact that someone can spend 8 years in the White House and come out broke.  And if that's not bad enough, she actually removed items that belonged to the American People and had to return them.  And the worst, your loved one actually SUPPORTS this craziness!

2.THE INAPPROPRIATE GIGGLE
It makes you giggle at inappropriate times that she might sit at the same desk that Monica Lewinsky once hid under.  Your loved one laughs at this too.  It is universally funny.

3.  CONFUSION AGAIN
Wait....she says that she's a feminist but her comments to Juanita Brodderick after the alleged rape by Bill Clinton makes you wonder:  Will she stop at nothing to gain power and control?

4.  DISBELIEF
There is no way that the average person can relate to Hillary Clinton.  She has admitted to taking $675,000 from speaking engagements on Wall Street.  And let's be honest...that's just what she's admitted to taking from speaking engagements!  It's very likely there is more that she hasn't disclosed.

5.  DISGUST
You aren't fooled by The Clinton Foundation even though your loved one clearly is.  The Foundation might do good things in Africa but what about the 60 companies who happened to be lobbying the State Department while Hillary was the Secretary of State and also just happened to donate more than $26 Million to The Foundation in the same time frame?  And those are American Companies.  Let's not even get started on the International donations.  Pay to play is disgusting.

6.  TRIPLE CONFUSION
Going back to the claim that Hillary is a feminist, you realize that The Clinton Foundation takes billions of dollars from countries where women aren't even allowed to vote, or go to college....or DRIVE.  That doesn't even make sense. Your loved one is smarter than this!

7. DENIAL
Of course your loved one would never vote for someone who owns a $12K jacket yet claims to be a champion for income inequality.  Never.  Ever.

8.  HOPE
Maybe, just maybe, if you present the facts to your loved one....maybe they will see that Hillary is just a professional Politician who will say whatever it takes to be the first female President.

9.  FRUSTRATION
Stating the facts doesn't work.  Your loved one still thinks that Hillary's hands are clean from the four American's who died in Benghazi, Libya in 2012.  Of course the was the Secretary of State and he was an Ambassador who worked for her.  Eh....those are just minor details to your loved one.

10.  HOPE AGAIN
The email server.  The classified information.  The lies to Congress.  The FBI investigation that laid out a clear disregard for National Security.  How is she even ELIGIBLE to run for President?  General David Petraeus was found guilty and only shared ONE classified document to someone who had a security clearance.  Five of her advisors have been given immunity.  The guy who did maintenance on the server never even had a clearance.  Better Americans have gone to prison for a whole lot less and she is STILL running for the highest office in the land.  Suddenly, you have hope that this is all a joke and that she will be indicted tomorrow.  That will solve all the problems.

11.  COMPLETE and UTTER SADNESS
The realization that these facts will never change your loved one's mind about supporting Hillary breaks your heart.  And then your heart is broken even more because you realize that we are screwed.  

Bigly.

Bigly Screwed.

It's either Donald or Hillary.  

God help us all.

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Hi. My name is Erin and I'm Old.

In case you wondered where I've been for the past seven months, my friend Kendra and I started a new photography business!  (Shameless plug:  check us out at www.pinehurstncphotography.com!!!  Whoo hooo!!!!)  Apparently, starting a new business is time-consuming.  Who knew?

So sit back, grab a glass of something....and let's talk about Social Media.

My friend Meilee told me the other day that Facebook is basically for old people because the young people these days are using Snapchat and Instagram.  For what it's worth, I have an account on all three outlets but I still prefer Facebook.  Snapchat seems stupid.  Or maybe I am...I don't know.  Why would I want to get a message that I can only read for a few seconds before it disappears?  And what the crap is a Snapchat story?  In my world, it's called a Facebook Timeline.

Anyhow, as an avid Facebook user, I accept the charge that I am old.  I will gladly wear that hat.  In fact, I will rock that hat so hard that everyone who sees me wishes they could also wear the "old" hat.

All the cool kids are old.  Duh.

Notice how I'm totally ignoring IG?  Yeah- I do that in real life too.  It's a good thing that Kendra runs our business IG.

So if we old folks are going to boycott the Snapchat and stick to Facebook, let's agree on some standard rules, shall we?

Look, I'm not trying to be all "BIG GOVERNMENT" here but I think we need to be on the same page about a few obvious things.

So, without further adieu, here are the rules that Mark Zuckerburg wishes he implemented when he invented Facebook:

FOOD PICTURES

Everyone eats food.  It doesn't make you special.  So if you feel compelled to take a picture of your dinner, please make sure it's a good picture or else people might confuse your corn-beef hash with vomit.  Let's also try to avoid paper plates, poor lighting and mush.

THIS is a good picture.  It's well-lit.  The food is pretty.

This is NOT a good picture of food.  The lighting.  The composition.  And for the love of good food....it's on a paper plate.  That could be the best spaghetti in the whole entire universe but no one wants to see it....much less eat it.  Mmmmkay?

FAKE NEWS STORIES

This one's easy.
If you see a "news" article from The Onion.  It's fake.
If you see that a celebrity has died, Google it first.  If it's not on CNN or MSNBC or TMZ, it's fake.

Another tip:  look at the date of the news article.  Sometimes you are sharing a story that is three years old.

Ain't nobody got time to read fake stuff.

EXERCISE

So you work out?  Great!  I'm really happy for you and so is everyone else on your friends list.  But guess what, when you post sweaty selfies, screenshots of the treadmill numbers or, worse, videos....we keep scrolling.  Unless we are all on a team of some kind (and let me be clear...I am NOT on a team that requires exercise or the documentation of exercise), then No.  Just no.  Because if you need everyone to know that you are working out, maybe you aren't doing it for YOU. 

POSTS THAT REQUIRE ME TO SHARE

You know what I'm talking about.  "Cut and paste this as your status if Jesus is your Lord and Savior."  

Unless I'm mistaken, there isn't an 11th Commandment that says, "Thou shalt share all Facebook statuses when My name is written in the post."

Jesus knows that I love Him and it's not because I share a status.

Which leads me to the next rule...

NO PREACHING....

....unless you are a preacher.  In which case, preach on preacher-man. 

Don't get me wrong, if you want to share a verse, write some encouraging words or forward an article or story that helped you, that's GREAT!  But when you start getting all....preachy (like legit preachy)....you are stepping out of bounds.  

It's like that time I read an article on WebMD and then tried to do surgery.

SELLING THINGS

I would like to preface this by saying that I have lot of friends who were friends with me BEFORE they started selling things to make extra money.  This is fine.  This is great, in fact!  I'm talking about the people that I've never met in real life who friend request me so they can try to sell me a purse or some leggings, or some make-up.

Unless you are selling a little elf that will live silently in my house and do all the cooking, cleaning and laundry....then it's cool.  I've never seen one of those for sale and I could totally use one.

Oh wait...I'll also take a tree that grows money.  In fact, I'll take two of those.

So that's it...I think.  Is there anything I left off the list? 

And if you missed me, leave a little love in the comments section.  Everyone loves love. 

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When Panera {almost} Ruined My Life

Once upon a time, Panera Bread took my favorite item off the menu and when I tried to find an acceptable meal replacement...it wasn't pretty.  Let's just say I had no choice but to write a letter.    The following is my actual letter to Panera Bread Customer Support. 

And to prove that they just might be the coolest Customer Support group ever, I've also copied their response. 

 

(My letter)

 To Whom It May Concern:

I love Panera and when I go out for lunch, I usually order the Soba Noodle Broth Bowl with chicken. It is, by far, THE best item that Panera has ever had on it's menu...even better than the tomato soup which is really saying something. Last week, I opened up my handy-dandy Panera app to order the Broth Bowl only to find that it had been replaced with some other, not-as-delicious broth bowl options. I'm not saying I cried, but I did get a little salty.

 

Via The Cookin' Mama

 

However, the purpose of my email is not to complain about the Soba Noodle Broth Bowl. I am sure that some high-level marketing genius convinced management to remove the previously mentioned "broth bowl of the Gods" by using words like market elasticity and supply/demand. Those marketing people are smart and they probably know that WHEN you put it back on the menu, Panera stocks will quadruple and sales will go through the roof. I can't blame them for that.

The purpose of my email is to let you know that I had to settle today for lunch. I ordered the Chicken Soba Noodle Salad. I figured the flavor profile was similar to my Broth Bowl and I had to give it a shot. It was okay. I enjoyed the cilantro and wished there was more...I also wish it was warm...and that it had broth...but alas, I ate what should be considered the red-headed-step-child of the Soba Noodle Broth Bowl.

I ate it until I found a hair in my food. It wasn't my hair and I know that things like this happen because human beings are...well...human...and humans have hair.

I couldn't eat the rest of my salad. I probably wouldn't have eaten it all anyway. I just thought you might want to know that in an effort to find an acceptable replacement for the food item that henceforth shall only appear in my dreams, I was let down in more ways than one.

Don't worry. I'm not giving up on Panera but I will say that if you take the cheese pastry off the menu, all bets are off.

With a hungry, broken heart,

Erin Brady

(The Panera Bread Response)

Hi Erin,

 

I’m so sorry to hear your visit to our bakery-cafe (#601652) was disappointing. We want your visit to Panera Bread to be warm and relaxing, with friendly service and deliciously handcrafted food you can enjoy and feel good about.

 

Please be assured that this kind of complaint is extremely unusual. We work very hard to make sure that only products of high quality are provided at our bakery-cafes. If a product has not met your expectations and our standards, we want to know, and we appreciate you bringing this matter to our attention.

 

I am forwarding your feedback to the bakery-cafe management team so that they can make any necessary improvements. Though mistakes sometimes occur, we all want to make sure your next Panera Bread experience is a great one.

 

Erin, the good news is that our Soba Noodle Broth Bowl will probably be coming back around again before you know it and in the meantime I hope you will give some other delicious options a try! My favorite is Ricotta Sacchettini Pasta with Chicken and I would love to know what you think.

 

I'd love to invite you to visit us again. May I send you a Panera Bread eGift Card? Though I know that isn't the reason for your email, I would like the opportunity to make up for your disappointment. I'll look forward to hearing from you.

 

Sincerely,

 

Abbey

Panera Bread Customer Care

 

 

Abbey gets major cool-points for understanding that this is a game-changer when it comes to my lunch plans.  And also....I HAVE HOPE...that one day I can once again order the Soba Noodle Broth Bowl with chicken.  I NEED to share it with my children and grandchildren like I need to share my grandmother's recipe for stuffed cabbage and my mom's recipe for chocolate chip bars. 

Thank you, Abbey....for making my day and for ensuring that my heritage has an opportunity to appreciate the deliciousness that IS the Soba Noodle Broth Bowl with chicken.

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Kim, Hillary and September 11th

I have kept my mouth shut for as long as humanly possible.   I'm literally choking on my words as I type.  Y'all are probably sick of hearing about this but...there are two things I have to know....

First, what is wrong with Kim Davis?

Look, I'm all about freedom of religion.  I got it.  And I understand that the First Amendment (and everything else in the Bill of Rights for that matter) needs to be protected at all costs.

I live in The Bible Belt and I bet that about 85% percent of my friends on Facebook are reading this while shaking their heads and probably saying a prayer for me.  I am a proud Southern Baptist.  I direct the choir at my church.  My sister-in-law and I are over the youth program.

I know what The Bible says and frankly, I always go back to the part where Jesus said that the greatest commandment is to love the Lord thy God with all your heart and the second commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself.


That's it.  That's what He said.

It doesn't say to love your Christian neighbors and distance yourself from everyone else.  It especially doesn't say that you should disregard nonbelievers.

Allow me to put this "job thing" in context.

Let's say that I got a job at Wal-Mart as a cashier.  And let's say that the first time someone came through the line with alcohol, I informed the customer and my management that I couldn't ring that person up because my religion tells me that drinking alcohol is against God's will. 

Or let's say I was a physician working at a family practice.  And let's say that an obese woman came in the office because she had heart disease.  Let's say that I told the owner of the practice that I couldn't see this patient because gluttony was a sin according to my religion.

How about this?

Let's say that I got a job waiting tables at a local restaurant and about six months after I started work, they added a pork bar-b-que sandwich to the menu and I refuse to serve it because I'm Jewish and my religion does not endorse the consumption of unclean animals.

In all of these cases, the boss would have told me to pack my stuff and go home.  How is this any different?

No one is MAKING her work there against her will.  She can quit any time she wants.

But why would she give up an $80K salary and 15 minutes of fame?  Not to mention the potential money she could make from interviews and book deals.

She wins.  Even though she claims to be "persecuted," she still wins.

Let's talk about someone else who keeps winning.  Disgusting, evil winning.

Hillary Clinton.

Which brings me to the second thing I have to know...

Who does Hillary think she is?

There are so many things that I could start with but since today is September 11th, let's start with Benghazi.  That really seems to be where her most-recent troubles started.

Here is the brief rundown of what happened:  The US Embassy in Benghazi was attacked on September 11, 2012 and four American's were killed.  The Obama administration and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton both blamed that attack on a YouTube video that incited rioting.  Congress didn't buy it.  Trey Gowdy opened up an investigation on Benghazi and in the process, uncovered the fact that Hillary used a private email server to conduct official business.

Although she vehemently denied that ANY classified information was on her server, 125 recovered emails have been deemed classified...and there are still thousands of emails to review. After the investigation started, she changed her verbiage to say that none of the emails were "marked" classified.

I know what you're thinking:  how am I supposed to know who is right?  

So I'll explain this to you.  First, let's not forget that the ONLY reason ANY of this was discovered is because she lied about the Benghazi attack.

Second, it doesn't matter whether those emails were marked or not.

Background:  When a person agrees to do work for the United States Government, he or she is granted for a personnel security clearance.  Before that person can do work, he/she must sign a non-disclosure agreement.  The proper term for the document is an SF-312.  Google it.  Read it.  It will leave you no doubt about this investigation.

At the same time that person signs the 312, he/she must also complete security training.  The training is repeated AL LEAST annually.

So not understanding the requirement is no excuse.

Also, there are only a handful of people who are approved to "classify" material.  One of those people is the Secretary of State.  We call this an Original Classifier.  Under policy, any information regarding another country is automatically classified until it is deemed otherwise.

So her claims that the material was "not marked" is irrelevant.  Additionally, the SF-312 specifically protects classified material both marked and unmarked.

Either way, the government wins and Hillary loses.

Does anyone else see the similarities here?  Both of these women believe they are above the law.

What is wrong with this country?  Hillary is STILL the leading Presidential candidate for the Democratic party and Kim is STILL a symbol of conservative Christianity.

As I'm writing this, I am watching a TV Special on September 11, 2001.  I can't help but think that if this madness with Kim and Hillary was in the news on the day of September 11, it would be squashed because we would have realized that some things just don't matter.  When lives are at stake, some things just don't matter.

Who cares what Kim thinks?  2,996 people were killed in a terrorist attack.
Who cares if Hillary gets the Democratic Presidential Nomination?  2,996 people were killed in a terrorist attack.

We would begin to wonder if the unprotected classified emails led to the attack.

We would see that Americans need to support Americans regardless of race, creed, color or sexual orientation.

We would undeniably love our neighbors as ourselves.

And we would turn to the Lord our God.

2,996 Americans were killed in a terrorist attack.

2,996 Americans were killed in a terrorist attack.

Let's not get so far away from that date and so far away from our feelings on that day that we forget.

Let's not forget.

Never forget.

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The Post In Which I Offend All Of My Readers (unless you happen to agree)

How is it possible that a person (ahem, me) can stop at a gas station, go inside to pay, then walk outside and pump her gas only to realize that her car keys cannot be located?

I don't know how it's possible but it is.  I did it today.  Thankfully I keep a spare key with me so I wasn't stuck.

I did find the key laying right on top of the center console about four hours later.  As if I didn't look there 453 times...but whatever.

We had our Vacation Bible School at church last week so on top of my kids being sick and still trying to work full time, I spent every night in church teaching songs and dances to kids of all ages. I helped the teenagers with this video; they taped it and explained the task to all the adult participants.  I simply put it together.  It is 100% their work and I am SO proud of them!!! It made the late nights and shared stomach flu totally worth it.

 

Due to the extensive time I spent at the church, I didn't get a chance to write about all the (not so) awesome things that happened in the world last week.  And boy...did crap hit the fan when I wasn't looking.

So let's hit these up in bullet points:

• Planned Parenthood:  You are drunk; go home.  Since when was it legal and/or moral to sell infant body parts?  I'm not even talking about abortions, that's another topic...I'm talking about selling parts of living human beings.  It's gross and disgusting and taxpayer money flowing to this company needs to stop.
• Iran Nuclear Deal:  Because everyone knows Iran has a history of following the rules, right?  Basically we have guaranteed that Iran will have nukes in the next 5-10 years.  In case you aren't familiar with Iran, these are the same people that gathered by the thousands shouting "Death to America" after the deal was signed.  Good job, John Kerry and President Obama...way to look out for Americans.  I'm friends on Facebook with people who live outside of the United States and these people were giddy about the deal...hailing John Kerry as a brave hero.  I would love to invite all of those people to New York City to visit the September 11th Memorial at Ground Zero.  There are people in this world who hate Christians and Americans and ONLY want us dead; let's not forget what they did to us on 9/11 and let's remind our politicians that we will not accept these punk deals with terrorists.
• Chattanooga:  Maybe it's time to rethink "gun-free zones" in places where our military personnel work?  Call me crazy, but if they can carry a weapon in Afghanistan, why the hell can't they carry a weapon in a Federal Building inside the United States?  This is a George W. Bush Clinton law that needs to go....now.  So maybe we won't have anymore Fort Hoods or Navy Yards.Yes?  Yes.
• Caitlyn Jenner: "She" won the Courage award at the ESPYs and then it was leaked that the award was negotiated in exchange for mentions on "her" new reality show.  Of all the people in the world of sports who exhibited courage this year, that's the best you can do?  Good job, ESPN.  You also are drunk and should go home.  
• Kate Steinle: A 32 year old woman murdered in a very public place by an illegal immigrant who had been convicted of seven different felonies and had been deported at least five previous times.  We need to rethink get rid of Amnesty and Sanctuary Cities.  It's literally killing us.
• Donald Trump:  How is it possible he has a double-digit lead over Scott Walker?  Look, I don't hate Donald Trump as a rich person who is weird and needs a new toupee, but let's be realistic...he will NEVER occupy the Oval Office and for that reason, he is only hurting the other 150000000 Republican Candidates.
• Republican Candidates:  Enough is enough.  Y'all need to get together and decide who should run...back that person and drop out or else we are going to have a third party candidate who will guarantee a Democratic President in 2016.  No one I know wants to say President Hillary Clinton so come on...get it together.

Now that I have probably isolated myself from anyone who would read my writings.  It's okay if you disagree.  I disagree every day with people that I love very much.  It's called democracy and it's why our Founding Father's created this great country.

The only thing that's going to keep this country great is if we stay on top of current events and hold our elected officials' feet to the fire.  Whether you agree with me or not...find you place and make your voice heard.

If you aren't registered to vote, please do so today.

And if you have never lost your keys in your car, please don't rub it in my face.

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Your Kid is a Jerk and I Think I Know Why

I adore my three children.

I love my friends' children.

I also love the children in my extended family.

But chances are, unless you fall into one of those categories, I don't really like your kids.

Now don't get mad and write mean comments until I've had a chance to explain myself.  It's not even the kids' faults.  Kids are just a reflection of their parents, right?

 As a parent, I know that there are days where my children are "off."  They cry more, whine more and argue more.  But for the most part, they are pleasant to be around and, dare I say, even FUN to be around.

This is not the case with every child.  Hence my story...

We live in a community with several lakes, public "beach" accesses, boat ramps, play grounds, etc.  It's a great amenity when your children are obsessed with playing outside.  This past Saturday, we met some friends at one of the public lake accesses so the kids could swim and eat dirt play in the sand.

Hello Lake-Baby

 It was so nice.

There weren't that many people there; the big kids left the little kids alone; the parents were friendly.  Everyone was happy...

...until a car-load of people pulled up and rolled out of the car, one after the other after the other.  The crowd consisted of two parents, a little boy and about five little girls...all under 7.  The little girls weren't sisters; they all looked about the same age and probably had a sleepover to celebrate the end of school.  (Hooray for summertime and sleepovers!!!)

Reese was so excited when she saw the other little girls.  She ran over to them and started talking to them and telling them about her sandcastle and the water and fish.  The little girls collectively looked at her like she was speaking Russian.

You want to see me go all Mama-Bear?  Then ignore my kid when she's talking to you.

The parents were right there.  And instead of saying something like, "Honey, that little girl just asked you a question.  You should answer her because it's the polite thing to do," the mom sat down in a beach chair and pulled out a book.  Reading may be fundamental but parenting is more important.

But whatever...kids are kids, right?  Reese is more resilient than me so she just went back to the water and was happy as a lark.

The little girls and the dad proceeded to play in the water as another car pulled up.  This car must have contained the families of the other little girls...they all knew each other.  There were more kids than I could count...of all ages.

The dad of this family unloaded a ginormous water-floaty-hamster-wheel-thingy.  The beach area of this public access isn't THAT big and it was already crowded with the kids playing on the shore.  This "aqua treadmill" was huge and could easily fit three standing adults inside. 

This is what it looked like:

via

After they put it in the water, this thing was out of control.  The wind kept blowing into the beach area where the little kids were playing or it would run over the older kids further out in the lake area.  Not even the dads could control it.

Some of the kids that weren't with this large group wanted a turn on the ginormous hamster wheel but were never afforded the opportunity.  Usually when people bring large items like this to a public access, they share and take turns.  Not this time; these poor kids were just expected to get the hell out of the way when the wind started blowing it in their direction.

Meanwhile on the shore, the smaller kids with this group were running a muck.  They would pick up Reese and Nathan's toys and throw them out into the water.  Or smash the sandcastle that Reese was building.  Or pick up yet another toy and throw it out into the water.

And all the while the moms were planted in their chairs likely reading their monthly book club selections and ignoring the fact that their offspring were acting like complete jerks.

We left soon after all of this transpired and I've been running this through my mind for days.  Those kids were jerks.  Why?  I just couldn't understand it.

I've finally figured it out.  Those kids were jerks because their parents were jerks.
 
And thus the cycle starts:  jerks beget jerks.  (Isn't that in the Bible?  Kidding...)

Yeah, I said it.  Your kid is a jerk because you are a jerk.

Parents, let's all agree that we should teach our children basic things like 1) how to respond when someone speaks to them; 2) how to share; 3) how to respect other people's toys.

And for goodness sake, let's show our children that we love them by actually paying attention to them.

Parenting is the hardest, most thankless job in the world but society begs you....don't beget jerks.  There's enough of those already.

"The most effective way to raise a nice child is to be a nice adult," L.R. Knost

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Four years: In the Blink of an Eye

Parenting is a funny thing.  The days are long.  The nights are longer.  You push through exhaustion and ear infections and road trips and diaper explosions and laughter and first steps until one day you wake up and your baby isn't a baby anymore.  You wonder how time can both speed by and drag along.

Tomorrow Reese Ann turns four years old.  It seems like only yesterday we were taking these pictures in her nursery...fresh paint on the walls and furniture that had yet to be used.

Reese Ann at 11 Days Old

Don't let these newborn pictures fool you.  Reese is what I like to call spicy.  She was born with a bigger-than-life personality and more energy than one person should be allowed to possess.

 More often than not, she is talking or singing or screaming. See below for photo evidence.

 And sometimes, she is very serious.  How silly of me to put her beside a pumpkin for Halloween?

She was born with blue eyes and a head full of blonde curls.   99.5% Brady and 0.5% Yonish.

There are still days, four years later, that I look at her and ask God how I was lucky enough to be her mom?  She is hilarious. She is beautiful.  She has a huge heart. 

 And of course I would be remiss if I didn't mention the crazy things I've had to say to her.  These words have actually come out of my mouth:

"Please do NOT floss your toes with french fries!"

"Reese, we don't spit chocolate milk and let it run into our neck fat!"

"Toilet paper is NOT for eating!"

But clearly blue icing IS for eating.

There were times that Reese shoved food items in random places....like gummy bears in the USB port of a computer or cookies in the DVD-player (a la Elf). 

There was a period of time that she only wanted to wear a hula skirt. Okay...I can't blame her for that.  Hula skirts are sort-of awesome.

Then there was that time she played hide and go seek by herself.

Or the time when she was 18-months-old and I was in the shower....she got in the bathroom and started throwing random items in the tub like toilet paper and clothes and towels...all the while I was trying to stop her (unsuccessfully, I might add) and getting shampoo in my eyes hollering for her to stop putting stuff in the shower.  What was Reese's response?  Laughter.  Just Laughter.

Life with Reese is funny. 

Hilarious.

And it has zoomed by.

I can't believe my sweet girl will be four when she wakes up in the morning. 

Thank you for bringing more joy (and laughter) (and naps) to my life than I ever thought possible.

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